Bending Blues

I culdn't belieeve it when my partner showed up at teh barn today. Ew, it was raining and cold! But not for me cuz I has a waterproot 220gram high neck rug on. Oh but tehn I rememberd, we have teh arena wiht teh cover and teh fake suns. And latelies my partner spends time watering teh dirt in tehre..so far no grass is growing, teh suns aren't strong enough I guess.

Anyways, todays I get tacked up wiht teh saddle, which is a change cuz latelies I has been doing ground work. Whatever, no big deal. Tehn teh boots on, and tehn to teh arena. Warming up I showed my partner how much practice of streching and trotting all at once. My steps are still a little small, but I has stretches and it has good feeling.

Once warmed up, we do real stretches of teh legs, I has hard times stretching my hind legs. My partner laughs and says I need yoga. Is taht a flavor? If so I want it!!

A little more work on teh longe, and tehn we go for a ride. Apparentlies tehre is a lot of decisions to be made cuz I want to control teh bit and I want to control wehre we goes and teh speed. And apparentlies taht is not waht my partner had in mind. So todays I tried to ignore her leg until it was so damn annoying I just muved over already. and tehn teh other way. I didn't really like this at all, but muving to teh right from teh left leg was much better for me. teh other way has difficulties! I try to grab teh bit and run away, but taht doesn't work so well- but I still try every now and again.

Wahtever, we didn't even has speed. No trottings. Just tihs moving over stuff. Bending tihs way and taht, me trying to eat teh reins inbetween cuz I am hungry and wants flavors and don't really want to do much more of tihs.

Finally it was all over and I got my flavors afterall. Good ones too, but nothing new in teh bucket.

Getting teh Hang of It

I really don't want to admit tihs, but I tihnk my partner has rightness wehn she asked me to soften to teh bit. And maybee she has rightness wehn she says I shuld try to stretch wehn I trots. Waht I didn't knoe tehn is taht teh whole system helps me has better moves, which I definitelies want!

So the past cuple dayz we has been playing on teh longeing line and on teh ground, mostlie working on my manners wiht teh bridling process and making better moves trotting. My partner says I has to build more top of teh line muscles.

No matter how much ass-behavur I has, no matter waht I do taht may make sumeone mad or scared, my partner has no anger to me. I really don't get it. She just says "try again." She has no scaredness or madness about teh tinhgs I don't like and try to get away from. Wehn I see her not so scared and has focused look on teh job, I realize maybe I shuld has more focus too and perhaps maybee less ass-behavur.

She told me I worked hard yesterday. I tried my verry best. Like I has said before, I has no problem pleasing teh mares.

Bit o' Fun

Humph. Apparently teh idea behind my tooths getting a float was so I could start wearing a bit. Lets say teh first day I has bad feelings towards tihs idea. But my partner tells me I culd has so much softness and better talks wiht her if I gives it a try. Ok, so I tried to pull teh reins out of her hands, hahaha. I knowes I shuldn't do taht but I like to try to chew on teh reins.

She kept trying to change my mind and finally it worked, but I was pretty stubborn about keeping to my ideas. I guess it does feel better tihs way afteralls.

A Letter to teh Big Guy...

Dear Santas,

I has had very good manners tihs year. I eats all my flavors and takes people for rides.

Taht said, I wuld like to ask yu for a Christmas present. I wuld like to have a pair of easy boot epics. My hooves has better feelings wiht tehese boots and I has better moves. Teh size I need is 2. New or gently used is ok- whatever yu have at yur shop.

Otehr tahn that, flavors! I luv tehm.

Love,

Ernies

Eh

Eh, as it turns out, I don't really has good feelings or excitement about akupunxshure. I didnt realise it has needles. Ew.

Teh rest of teh stuff was okays. I has good adjustments in my tmj and neck and back and stuff like taht. And teh vet said I gained manee body scores since teh last time she saw me. Has fats!

I gets a couple days rest and tehn back tu working.

I has so much excitement

I heard sum human mares talking yesterday and tehy said teh vet is coming. From waht I gather, teh vet comes in 1 more sun and moon. So by human calculations, taht wuld be Fridays.

Tehese human mares fully believe taht tihs vet will helps me make has better moves. Sumtihng about floating teeth...i tihnk I recall taht stuff but usually I has sleepiness at taht time so I dont quite remember waht its about. And tehn stuff called kyropraktx and akyupukshure. I tihnk I has had tihs kyropraktx but never teh other tihng.

But wahtevers- if its all about mee (and it is), and its gonna make me feel good, tehn i has excitements about it.

I also gets to try wearing boots on my front hooves cuz human mare trimmer friend says I stab teh ground wiht my front hooves. I has excitement about tihs cuz I has seen Faith and Franks wear tehm boots, and I has jealousy over it.

Trickery and Cantering

Tihs is what my afterhnoon has:

Partner: Oh Hai Ernie, lets play in a minute.
Mee: Okay, I wuld like tu.

halterings, tieings, blanket offs, papayaya treat, groomings saddlings, hoof pickings, off to teh arena.

Partner: Okay ernies, lets warm up at teh walk, stick to teh arena wall, ok?
Me: Okays, I can do taht though I tihnk trottings may be better.
Partner:No, just walk right nows.
Mee: Okays.

some time passes at teh walk

Partner:Ok Ernies, lets warm up at teh trot nows after i tighten teh girth a little.
Me:Okays.

trotting trotting trotting...stop, switch directions...trotting trotting trotting

Partner: Ernies, today we works on stretching teh legs by taking bigger steps but not speeding ups. I'll let yu knows if yu has too much speeds or if you has to take bigger steps
Me: Okay, I do my best but I want to has speed.

trotting...tries to has speed but she was serius about taht slow stuff.

Partner: Wow, its getting dusty in here, Ernie. I dont think we're gonna ride tonight.
Mee: Oh reallys? Tihs very announcement makes me has sadness.

as i stand tehre while partner and barn owner chat about stuff, secretely has hopes i can go eat my dinner flavors now.

Partner: Ok, well, since we're already dressed for teh riding, I'll just hop on for a walk.

Me: Waht? We were finished!!!! Teh other horses are eatings! I am being left out! Someone, probably, Franks, is gonna eat my flavors!!!! Ok fine, we just walk, but I has an eye on him.

all of a sudden we're walkings and trottings and circles and serpentines. I has kept my promise by being less of teh ass I was last week.

Partner: OK Ernie, I'm gonna ask you to has canter steps now.
Me:What the?!??! NOOOOOO! Yu sais no riding and now canterings? I shall bite your legs!

Partner: Uhh, No Ernies, just give it a try.
Mee: Fine. Yu want try? I give yu one

hop in teh front taht my partner tihnks is canter wehn its really rear.

Partner:GOOD BOY Ernie!
Me: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH, yu serious? U just rewarded me for being bad.

Partner: Well, lets trot a bit more.
Mee: Okays... but i really want my flavors now.

trotting trotting trotting

Partner: OKay Erniees, Now canter.
Me: I SHALL Bite your legs!

Partner: Noes, just canter, I'll ask again.
Me: Well, okay, since you asked again.

canter canter canter

Partner: Good boy Ernie! We're done. Lets just has cool down time nows. Tehn flavor time.
Me: Sweet! I luv flavors. Don't Aneeone in teh barn steal tehm.

I has no problems making teh human mares happy.

Can't touch tihs

Todays has teh coldest temperatures and winds so far. If I could do teh boogie, I would. Okay, I did do teh boogie equine stylz, running back and forths with lots of rears and buks for good measurs. Franks and Faith and I put on teh show!

My partner came by and gave me an afternoon snack of beet pulp, and some herbs taht make my tummy feel good when I exercise. I also got 2 helpings of taht orange papayaya stuff again- new flavors are always welcome!

Nobody felt like riding todays, so we played on teh ground. We set up jumps and squeezed over tehm. First you line up for it. Tehn you wait for your partner to say "go" by lifting teh finger and pointing over teh jump and yu GO! Tehn stop after and turn and face. and tehn goe teh other way.

Its so much fun!!! I love jumping! I can jump over anything, including horses like Franks, which I almost had to do today, but I was too tired, so I just reared instead.

Promises Must Be Kept

I knowes I has attitudes about different stuffs- like teh other night when i was a jerk about moving my hooves. My partner had many werds to share with me. I told her tomorrows I has better moves.

So tomorrow is now todays, and I has better moves. I feels good, but I tihnk my partner felt badlies about yelling at me yesterdays- she brought me stuff today as "i has sorries gifts." Before teh ride my partner gave me some papaya stuff- was yummy but took me by surprise! Tehn we added another pad for under teh saddle. And i also got to wear a jumping hackamore for a change.

When on teh longe line, I practiced how to go from walks to canter with a kiss noise. My partner tells me to not forget teh back legs, she says i sumtimes has crossfires back theres.

Wehn all tihs has finished, we ride. I goes every single time. I tihnk I took 2 times to give nasty ears but I gaves it up quick after rememberings our talk last night.

All in alls everytihng has better feel tonights. I has proudness.

Pop Quiz part II

I knowed it was gonna happen sumtime. Human mares are so quick to say horses are teachers. Of course horses know tihs, but what we don't let on most of teh time is taht sumtimes humans teach horses too.

Todays we has some times for riding, and so we did. Very good walkings, over poles, between teh poles. Tehn it all fells apart when I decided I wanted to be teh one to decide when we trots, walks and stops. Well, shouldn't I be teh one to decide cuz My hooves are teh ones on teh ground? I stick by my theories.

All of a sudden my partner threw up her hands and says to mees, "Fine Ernees. Has attitudes. I dont has to ride yu, I has plenty others to ride- BETTER ones to ride, like Franks. To be honest, I dont see how yu can be an eventer anyways cuz yu has too much stoppings. Eventers don't do tihs. Tihs is teh end of teh roads for yus, I am finding a new horse to ride."

WHOAS hold teh train! I dun't know waht button I pushed but I just got told off!!! She dismissed me!!!! Seriously, I'll be better. And I was, rights? We had tihs very talk and tehn I trotted. I guess I do want to be an eventer and all teh best of tehm has goes and not so much stops.

Damn. Yu got me.

Try again tumorrow- I has even better moves yet.

Pop Quiz

I has always been a teacher. Many human mares have said tihs very fact about mees. Wells, all good teachers has to give tests every so often to make for sures taht teh student understands teh principles.

Today was Pop Quiz day at teh barn. A perfect day for teh test cuz my partner left her wand in teh tack room. So no magics could help. No cheating tonight!

Teh pop quiz question was simple: who gets to choose when teh hooves move? Being teh best teacher ever, I pulled out all teh stops- quite literally. If I wasn't stopping, I was GOING. My partner laughed at me and called my bluffs. She says "fine...yu wanna go? LETS GO!" DING DING DING! She knows I didn't want to go for reals.

Tehn I tried stopping. Swing my head from side to side. She just laughed and said she has all day for me. Okay, fine. If yu tink yu knowes everything, how bout when I buck? Stuck like glue and just asked again. I goes. She tells me good boys. Asks for teh go again, and I goes. One more time. Switch directions.

Tehn we're done. We cool downs and go insides.

So after examining teh results, I has to admit I has done a good job teaching, cuz my student passed.

If anyone else wants lessons, let my partner know about it and we'll hook yu up.

Has Wrong-ness!!!!

I has bad attitude this weekend cuz my partner has basically been missing for teh last week. I has grumpies about it. But yesterday she esplained taht she has busies taking care of a friend, horse mare, taht needed her helps. Okaaay, fine. I gives.

Howevers, I has noticed taht latelies I has not as many flavors in my buckets as usuals. I don't like to accuse of wrong doings, but i has a feeling taht i has to share now with other horses so i gets less. This has wrongness!!!!!!

Well, no. Fine. My partner says I has too much fats now and its time to cut back a little. Too much fats? Mees? Lady, its a winter coat, not fats!!!!! Why won't she listen??

I has huuuunger pains. Owwwww. Abuse. Call someone. And make sure tehy bring more flavors, K, Thanks.